01.01.2016

Happy New Year!

I just wanted to say that I’m very grateful for this past year and I’m looking forward to more growth, love, and adventures in 2016. I’m going to be 25 in about eleven months - quarter century here I come!

Looking back on 2015, I really felt like I made an effort to reconnect with myself and realize what I loved about my life and what changes were needed. I discovered which friends were truly treasures and which ones I grew apart from. I met amazing people and went to even more amazing places. I learned a lot about my resilience, but also my weaknesses. But weaknesses aren’t necessarily a bad thing. I think they have to be there in order to find strength. This past year I’ve realized how good it could be to just be alone and how important it was to always be myself and to make sure I am always improving and becoming a better person.

I was able to communicate and have much delayed conversations with my family. I think we all know each other a little better and I hope that I’ve been able to open their minds,
if even just a little.

My New Years resolutions this year will be a short list, but I’m hoping that a little will go a long way.

1. Realize that when you are offended, it isn’t necessarily a personal attack, but a result of insecurity or animosity because of people’s situations. Perceive past the surface and try to understand why they think and act the way they do, with a little patience. Let things go and see it as an opportunity to spread awareness.
2. Meditate, write, and read the news everyday.
3. Exercise at least 4x a week (Hot Yoga on Wednesdays)
4. Create art more often, at least once a week.
5. Be grateful, be kind, be compassionate. Every single day.

The world is a scary place and life is a difficult road. But with a little love and a lot of passion, we can all do what we can to make people feel a little less jaded and have a little more faith in humanity. I think that’s why my first New Years resolution is so important. I need to make sure that before I get offended or get on the defensive, I need to put myself in other people’s shoes and realize where they are coming from. I need to work on letting things go, because when people hurt others, it isn’t always out of spite, but out of a lack of knowledge or perception.

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

I want 2016 to be about positive change and growth. Not just for me, but for everyone and whoever I can help nurture.

12.28.2015 - Mediocrity

Sorry for the lack of writing, it’s been a minute. I’ve been traveling and decided to just enjoy my holiday and not worry about anything, but I did want to write about this.

There’s been these three words that I promised myself a long time ago I would have a life without. Stupidity. Vapidity. Mediocrity.

I told someone the other day about these three words and he had an issue with the last one. Mediocrity, he said, wasn’t a choice and some people were just mediocre by nature or by the hand they were dealt in life.

Mediocrity (adj.): only of moderate quality, not very good, ordinary, average, uninspired, indifferent, forgettable.

I understand that there may be some things in life you can’t change, like the shape of your face, the color of your skin, or the texture of your hair. But I do believe that most things in life you can have an impact on, no matter how insignificant that impact may seem.

They say when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. What that means, is to not only be proactive to the obstacles you are faced with in life, but to also create solutions. The people who see these obstacles as challenges and not absolute rules are the ones that will climb to the top. If you don’t think you are smart enough, read. If you aren’t athletic enough, train. If you aren’t talented enough, practice. Ignorance is a choice. Quitting is a choice. And so is mediocrity.

Mediocrity is synonyms with words like uninspired, indifferent, and forgettable. These are all words that are completely changeable. So what I’m really saying when I say that I don’t want mediocrity in my life, I mean that I want an abundance of the opposite - passion.

I want a life driven by passion and the belief that I can accomplish anything I put my mind to. I can overcome and achieve anything that I put my all into. I don’t want to be indifferent to life. Nor uninspired. And definitely not forgettable. If possible, I would hope that everyone could live a life without mediocrity.

Of course, mediocrity means different things to different people. The Olympics may not ever have been possible for me, but at a point, I believed it could be and that possibility drove me to my limits and further than I could’ve ever reached on my own. That passion got me there, so I would never see that as a failure. It ignited the passion I have in the environment, and now a passion for policy. I don’t see that as mediocrity. I haven’t found my calling in life yet, but I’m searching. When I do find it, I will give it everything. Because a life being indifferent isn’t enough.

So I stand by my last word. Everyone has a love for something. Everyone has a choice, however small. Just do it.

Don’t settle.

12.22.2015 - Investing

I spent a long time at my middle school friend’s new brokerage firm yesterday. She had invested into the firm to become a partner. She talked and taught me a lot about different types of investments and how her company was selling this life insurance/investment bundle called an IUL or something or other. 

Anyways, that kinda just flew over my head because I’ve only really studied 401(k), IRAs, Roths, and Single accounts. I had never heard of life insurance vehicles to investing. After studying about it online, it kinda got more and more sketch. There are a lot of pyramid scheme insurance companies out there to get you when you’re young and naive. They coerce you into buying life insurance when it is absolutely unnecessary for someone young and healthy. And then they try and get you to be an associate, hire your own associates, and perpetuating that pyramid effect that in theory, make some people tons of money. 

I feel a little taken advantaged of, to be honest. But it really was my own ignorance of personal finance. It’s pretty difficult to find a capable financial advisor who has you in their best interests and isn’t selling insurance or investment packages that only benefits them and gives them the highest commission return. I think that’s why companies like Vanguard, that’s owned by its shareholders and not by the providers, are so attractive. I can also see the interest in computer-based investing using programs like Betterment, Wealthfront, or FutureAdvisor. Computer programs follow algorithms and algorithms are very unlikely to have a conflict of interest that most advisors have.

In a list of priorities, I’ve learned through books and personal finance classes that you should: 

  1. Maximize employer match to 401(k)
  2. Pay off debts and emergency fund for 3-6 months living expenses
  3. Maximize tax-deductible contributions to an IRA (Roths, you don’t get taxed when you take out, traditionals you deduct tax when you put in, $5,500 maximum contribution for both annually)
  4. Max out tax-deductible 401(k) or 403(b) for nonprofits ($17,500 maximum contribution annually, which can be tax-deducted) 
  5. Additional funds go into a single investment account, mutual funds, or other taxable investments packages (I think I might do Betterment or FutureAdvisor if I get to this point)

So where does whole life insurance fit into all this? In reality, it doesn’t really unless you have maxed out every other avenue of your portfolio. If you have a family or people you are supporting, then life insurance would be beneficial to ensure your beneficiaries will be okay financially if something were to happen to you. However, at 24 years old, I am an active, non-smoker, and not a regular drug-user. So my costs of insurances would probably outweigh the capital gains I could get if I simply put it into a mutual fund - or better yet, my 403(b).

The thing about being young is, there is a multitude of people trying to capitalize on your naivete.

Make mistakes and learn from them. 

But don’t be an idiot. 

I need to study up some more on finances. 

12.21.2015 - Waking Up Early

The thing I love about school is that it gets me up early in the morning. Before the sun comes up, before my family and my dogs are awake, before cars are out in the streets. That calm serenity in the nips of cold is really worth that extra hour or two. 

I wake up at 6:00 every morning and I like the 45 minutes it gives me to slowly lull around. If I could, I would want to wake up even earlier than that, but it’s been difficult breaking 6. I meditate after waking up using YouTube and my Headspace app (I really think the $100 a year is worth it). I also usually write in the morning, but sometimes I push writing to later that night if I don’t have thoughtful posts in my sleepy head. I find that writing in the morning comes with more positivity and gratefulness that starts the day off right. I get ready for work, drink a smoothie while reading the news on my phone, and then I walk my dogs and leave for the freeway. 

The only thing still missing from my morning routine is a 45 minute workout. I would need an extra hour every morning and waking up at 5 is so much more difficult than waking up at 6. That last hour stretch has been difficult for me, but if I can do it, I feel like my life would really improve for the better. 

Even today, I didn’t have school and I woke up at 9. But already it’s time for me to get ready to leave and meet a friend in the city so I’m out of time to work out. I’ll have to bring my things with me again and hopefully find some time this afternoon to get a workout and yoga session in. 

I’ve been packing things into my schedule. Tuesdays I have Toastmasters which is a public speaking and speech club to work on my presentation and teaching skills. Wednesdays I go into the city to do hot vinyasa yoga taught by my friend Michael. I wanted to start Japanese classes on Thursdays, but I’m torn between Japanese and Muay Thai/kickboxing. I wish there was more time in a day. I also wish I didn’t have so much wasted time in a day. It kills me a bit sometimes when I think about how much time I spend doing nothing. Things like Facebook and social media are really the death of my schedule. 

I’ll try again tomorrow morning. 

12.20.2015 - Narcissism

(You have been warned, this will be a rant.) 

I had a friend tell me today that this guy didn’t feel comfortable taking me to an event because he felt that he would be leading me on. That sounds like a virtuous, noble act but I see it in a different light.

I think it’s pretty telling of your narcissism when you assume someone is already in love with you and will be hurt if you invite them to something and have it mean nothing. To believe you are in the sole position of controlling where a platonic relationship goes is pretty presumptuous. That isn’t attractive at all. When did I ever give you a reason to think that I would care about whether we went somewhere as friends or not? Unfortunately for your ego, I do not like you and after learning about how self-absorbed you are, I don’t think I even like you as a friend. 

The issue with these people is that their douchebag mentality and belief that being an asshole will get them laid…

..Hasn’t been disproved enough for them to see the reality. Regardless of how much these people love themselves, girls (and guys) still ignore all the bullshit and fawn over them - perpetuating their twisted beliefs. Because of the people that are blinded by shallow reasoning, these assholes get away with it and will continue to get away with it. This is why you get many girls (and guys) who regret their one-night stands with these douchebags and become the ‘crazy, needy bitches’ society has stereotyped. 

Granted, this is completely these narcissists’ fault. But as the rest of the population, we have to remember not to forego our own values and fall privy to their games. We cannot let them keep winning and getting away with this shit. And we cannot give society a reason to label women (and men) as stupid, crazy, and needy when it isn’t even their faults.   

I will not be ‘led on’, you dickwad. I don’t like people who are only into themselves. 

They say nice guys finish last, but that’s some unjust, misogynistic bullshit. 

Take a fucking seat.